been promised to myself not to post anything selfish and unhappy in my blog
so I abandoned it for months.
but tonight, I experienced the so-called "heart has broken into pieces"
because of
‘你花的都是别人的钱’.
by the one I respect so much,
love so much,
cause I know she has contribute her everything to this family.
her youth.
trying to be her happy and obedient child everyday,
no matter how hard I tried,
I lose.
I lose.
no one understands what's the feeling I experience now.
-- feeling like a Parasite.
with no earning and dependent on siblings and parents.
relative been posted old photo when we were small.
we were happy family with no worries, no burden.
I miss that.I do.
we grew up.now.
and that
这间家越来越少人.
I hate.
I hate.
tonight, I am tired.
mentally and emotionally.
*************
I know,
crying can't solve my problem.
I am human.
I need to release my emotion.
**********
I promise.
I will be good as the usual me...
*******
